Walking Away

"Walking Away"
(Performed by: Jonny Lang)

You can cry

But don't cry for me

I can't take it no more

That's the way it must be

You can't lie

You're way back in

Back into my heart

I won't let it be broken again

I took a tumble

I started to stumble

That's when I fell

Into a love

A thought came from above

I was under your spell

The things that mattered

Were broken and shattered

One by one

I was so sad

But now I'm glad

It's over and over

There's just one more thing

That I want to say

I truly loved you

But now I'm walking away

I put no one above you

That's why I'm walking away

I wish it were so easy to walk away from something you know is no good for you.... I love Jonny Lang.  He was so young when he did this song and yet his voice is a true testament to how powerful the blues can be.... Amazing... Give him a listen some time: starting with this live version of this one:

SHOOK

Day lifts, night falls

At a distance, water falls

Life goes on, bitter still

Nothing left within to fill

The void, the hole, the unsweet end

The happiness you brought, my friend

I move but still I’m never moved

I ache with pain your love once soothed

Though I shook when you were near

I had no chill it wasn’t fear

At intense moments that we shared

I shook because I really cared

I guess I knew it wouldn’t be

You couldn’t love, at least not me

Little more than thief or crook

You stole my heart but never shook

Love can rattle you, leave you breathless, thoughtless and most definitely stupid... making you do things you would never do and say things you would never say... It has the power to make you completely idiotic... That is the fun it... But if its not returned it also has the power to break you... and leave you shattered.

What Else Is There?

What Else Is There?

(Performed By: Billy Ray Cyrus)

I've got a chair, you've got a bed,
We've got a dream or two running through our heads,
You can't cook, and I don't care,
What else is there?

I've got a car, you've got a room,
We can talk all night or make love by the moon,
Feel the love in the air,
What else is there?

Chorus:
People talk about troubles
Till there blue in the face,
Run around in circles
That's the whole human race,
I've got my own life figured out,
You're the sweetest thing I've ever found, 
God's smilin' down,
What else is there?

You've got this calm, I'm kinda crazy,
Might be a real cool combination in a baby,
Your eyes, my hair,
What else is there?

Chorus:
People talk about troubles
Till there blue in the face,
Run around in circles
That's the whole human race,
I've got my own life figured out,
You're the sweetest thing I've ever found, 
God's smilin' down,
What else is there?

Years from now, even then,
We'll get old and maybe go to bed by ten,
I'll hold your hand to climb the stairs,
What else is there?

Oh, What else is there?
What else is there?
What else is there?
What else is there?
What else is there?
(You know what we're talkin' about...)
What else is there?
What else is there?
What else is there?...

Life is empty without love... It is the single most important thing any person can have.  It doesn't have to be romantic love (Although that kind is wonderful), but family love and friends these are just as important.  I love this song... So simple... I love you... So what else is there?

Listen here:

Rain

I’m just a heartbreak away from despair

All my laughter seems to fade whenever you’re not there

And the teenage crush faded way with time

But I’ll always be a child in your stillborn eyes

I didn’t for a second set you free

And you seemed to like that ill effect you always had on me

Call it what you want to call it

Say it how you choose to say it

I only hope you won’t forget it, remember me

I’m just a lifetime past awaking from this dream

Just tryin to figure out what all this means

Here I am at circles end

Most of all I miss my friend

I’ve come to see that nothing’s what it seems

Now the games been called because of rain

It all remains, nothing stays the same

Call it what you want to call it

Say it how you choose to say it

I only hope you won’t forget it or what I became

I love how this poem turned out.... the rhyme scheme was much different for me... I usually do the standard ABCB, ABAB, or AABB patterns... I find it tough to write anything else to be honest so this was something different... the first stanza doesn't match the rest but I still love the flow of it... 

Utitled

Untiled

Author - Unknown

You don’t love me

And I burnt my tapioca pudding so the magic

Puffs are big weird lumps and I’m

Eating it anyway cause I don’t have any tomato soup

And all the boys who loved me hate me now

Cause I am evil or they are off in Europe

Spending all their money forever

And my boss hates me too

My cat died last summer and I forgot

Again to buy that weird bird water thing and

The birds can hardly drink water out of the

Margarine thing and they are probably

Really thirsty

And my roommate

Is always asleep and he would probably

Be nice to me if I woke him up but

That would be really pathetic and my roommate

The other one is really depressed too and he

Is learning to play the violin right now

And it is squeaking at me

And my hair is really dumb

I am really sad

:(  Brutal Honesty.... That's what I love about this poem... and why I've hung on to it for 15 years...

"You don't love me" ..... Sometimes the truth can be as simple as four little words.  "I am really sad"

She

She never knew love til she met him

She was still so insecure

She was hoping for a hero

Someone to rescue her

She fell so fast she didn't see

She gave him everything she had

She smiled through the pain he caused

And never showed that she was sad

She loved him all her lifetime

Though he left her all alone

She still thought him her savior

Her heart, her soul, her home

Each choice she made, each chance she took

Every time she closed her eyes

She always held him ever close

In the corner of her mind

She lost herself, she lost her hope

She gave everything she had

She smiled through the pain he caused

And never showed that she was sad

Some people just get the short end of the stick when it comes to love.  No one knows why someone falls for someone they can't have... Or why some people are better at moving on than others... Unrequited love is truly one of the great tragedies of life.

365 DAYS

365 Days

(Performed by: Steven Tyler Mullendore)

365 days since I seen your face

And I haven’t missed a note

Lot of people said time heals everything

Well I say that it don’t

I swear it was just yesterday

That you held me close

Told me you love me so

Why’d the sun go up?

Why’d the sun come down?

Over and over and over

365 days since I heard your voice

It’s still ringing in my ears

I try to drown it out

With the booze and the cocaine

And pretend that I don’t care

Time travels fast

When you’re moving slow

But that’s the way it goes

I had it all then I lost it

Leaving me here all alone

Who we kidding

We are not the same

You won’t win

If you don’t play the game

You live and you learn

With no regrets

At least that’s what I tell myself to forget

365 days since I smelled your fragrance

Sometimes I wish I had no sense of smell

It kills me every time that a woman walks by

And she’s wearing vanilla

Got no clue

What you’re doing these days

But I bet money that you don’t care

I’d give absolutely anything

To run my fingers through your hair just one more time

This song belongs to Steven Tyler Mullendore.  A young Canadian talent living in Halifax at the moment... He did a stint on Canadian idol a few years back.... and he happens to be dating my cousin lol.... This isn't hype for family pride though... this is genuine respect for a great song that deserves more coverage.  Check out more of his songs on Songcloud at:

https://soundcloud.com/steven-tyler-mullendore

Listen to this one here:

Differences

You live in black and whites

I live in grays

You can let things go

With me they never fade away

You put your faith in God from way above

I put my faith in me, in us, in love

You see weak and I see strong

I see right where you see wrong

You’re the head and I’m the tail

I’m the sea and you’re the sail

Two different lives, two different views

Two different thoughts that can not fuse

Two different hearts that beat in time

Mine is yours and yours is mine

I am firm believer that opposites attract.  Maybe that was the problem with my last relationship.... we were too much alike... similar backgrounds... similar tastes... it can get boring real fast... I'd rather argue and debate and get worked up once in awhile... I'd like to have to agree to disagree... I'd like someone who makes me question my own beliefs... to make them stronger... to make me stronger...  I had someone like that once.... The one that got away....

Something More

"Something More"

Performed by: Ryan Malcom

I don't think that I can tell you what this means to me
But here I am, it's so hard to believe
That I'm standing here, that I've come this far
But you always said, have faith in who you are
I wanna take this time to thank you for the love you gave
from this moment, you've got to know

[Chorus:]
I never wanted something more, and never felt so sure,
'Cause now I've got this chance to be, everything you saw in me
And even more than I ever dreamed before,
As long as you are here with me, I know that I can be something more

Looking back now it's so clear to me,
That you were sent to shape my destiny
'Cause there were times when I was ready to walk away,
But you gave me strength to face another day
I wanna take this time to thank you for the love you gave
And from this moment, you've got to know

[Chorus]

I never wanted something more, and never felt so sure,
'Cause now I've got this chance to be, everything you saw in me
And even more than I ever dreamed before,
As long as you are here with me, I know that I can be something more

I reaching for the sky, won't let this chance go by
I've waited all my life for something more,
And now's the time you're gonna see,
From this moment you've got to know

[Chorus]

I never wanted something more, and never felt so sure,
'Cause now I've got this chance to be, everything you saw in me
And even more than I ever dreamed before,
As long as you are here with me, I know that I can be something more

You make me want to be something more
You make me want to be something more

Some people walk into our lives and change it in a way they could never possibly understand.  I am lucky enough to have a few of these people in my life but one in particular stands out in my mind.  Because of him I am stronger, more confident,  have more faith, more love and more hope than I ever could have without him.    I will be forever indebted to all he has taught and shown me and I will love him.  Always.

The Northern Lights

The northern lights were dancing

The perfect time for sweet romancing

We were under the stars

Sitting in your car

And we didn't say a word

The world sparkled around us

It’s life seemed to surround us

We were under the stars

Sitting in your car

And we didn't say a word

The night was all we heard

And it felt right

Cherish the perfect moments... we don't get a lot of them... make everyone count... cause life is too short.

DROWN

DROWN

(Charity Matheson)

Staring out a window so dirty I can’t see

Staring at my new life and what it used to be

Staring down a road with a gate closed to my past

Staring out the window but still can’t break the glass

Walking down an ally the air as cold as you

Walk into my own cage with nothing I can do

I can run away now but I can’t run that far

Everywhere I run to I’m always where you are

Bow your head now

It’s time to wear your crown

You always get what you deserve

And you deserve to drown

Screaming into the darkness with no one in reply

Screaming in my heart but I’m too proud to cry

Screaming on the inside I realize what I’ve done

Screaming on the outside I hope you’ve had your fun

Hiding from myself in places I can’t stay

Hiding from the voices and all they had to say

Hiding from surprises sometimes they let you down

Time I get what I deserve watch me as I drown

Poetry is all about interpretation.  One person may read this poem and think of a lover, while another may read and think of a parent or friend... one person may say this poem is about shame while another may say it's about hate... I think that's the joy of poetry.. You can take you're own life and often make it fit in some way to another's even if your situations are completely different... it helps so many people relate to one another... same with music... it really is a magically art form.. 

No Replacement

Dignity, lost within your arms

Shame was found there in

Pride was lost after you left

Frowns where smiles had been

Heart of happiness now of pain

Tears of joy now turned to sorrow

Looking forward to the day

Now turned to dread of tomorrow

A life to live now turned to death

The glitter in my eyes now glazed

No gamble, I would always win

But since you left the stakes were raised

The salty pain of what I lost

Drips down my pale and moistened face

You were all my life was for

And can never be replaced

I really loved the way this poem came together... I wrote this in March of 2001... Not long before I moved to Flin Flon...  I guess I would have been almost 19 at the time... I love looking back through these old poems... They bring up so many memories... both good and bad... but definitely ones that are important to who I am today.  That's what my poetry was when I was younger... My diary... My safe place.  The place I went when I needed to vent... everyone needs that... for some people it's another person... for many its any of a number of art forms... for some its sports... or work... This was my way... and I still find it very therapeutic to sit down and write a poem and try to make sense of some of the thoughts that swirl around inside my brain.... Try it sometime... you may find it works for you too...

HERE WITH YOU

I have a new life

I’m making new friends

I have a great job

I’ve met some cute men

And life’s going good

Like you told me it would

But at night when I sleep

It’s just you and me

Chorus

And starting over ain’t what I had hoped

Thought that I could run away from the heart that you broke

I still recall the endless fights we had that made me blue

But no matter where I go I’m here with you

I wanted freedom

I had to escape love

I wanted to make up

But you didn’t feel us

And I had a plan

Hoped I’d win you back

But look at us now

It’s over somehow

Chorus

And starting over ain’t what I had hoped

Thought that I could run away from the heart that you broke

I still recall the endless fights we had that made me blue

But no matter where I go I’m here with you

No matter what I do I’m missing you

My whole world centers round the love I have for you

If I had stayed would it have made all my dreams come true

No matter where I go I’m here with you

I wrote this song shortly after I moved to Flin Flon...  Truth is I don't regret moving to Flin Flon... I've made a ton of new friends, had a career I loved, and had two beautiful children but moving back to Swan now seems like the right thing for me to do.  I don't know if it can be called a fresh start as ultimately I do have some demons to face when I get there but I am looking forward to a second chance... Whatever that may mean.

OURS

Can’t wait to see your face again

To touch your hand, to see your smile

Can’t wait feel your warmth again

But somehow I MUST wait awhile

I’m coming home before you know it

Counting seconds, minutes, hours

Just waiting for that special moment

The one that ours and only ours

Where the eyes meet and the soul it sighs

And that feeling ever flows

Where words are spoken gently, softly

Cause we both already know

With so much time between us

And with so much left unsaid

Will it be like all our yesterdays?

Or will a new day start instead?

Can we forgive, forget and carry on?

Will the spark that fuels us flare?

Can we finally take a chance on us?

I can’t know until I’m there…

So, I’m coming home before you know it

Counting seconds, minutes, hours

Just waiting for that special moment

The one that ours and only ours

Some moments are fueled with fire, with a kind of anticipation and spark that makes them key moments in our lives.  Sometimes we know they are coming and the thought of them causes us excitement, fear, maybe some anxiety and others sneak up on us without preparation.  These moments whether they are seen or unseen are those life changing... ever lasting ones that have the power to change the course of our lives and the very people we are... Those moments are the ones we live over and over again in our minds.   

Maybe

MAYBE

(Performed by: Sick Puppies)

Maybe I'm a dreamer

Maybe I'm misunderstood

Maybe you're not seeing the side of me you should

Maybe I'm crazy

(Maybe I'm crazy)

Maybe I'm the only one

(Maybe I'm the only one)

Maybe I'm just out of touch

Maybe I've just had enough

Maybe it's time to change

And leave it all behind

I've never been one to walk alone

I've always been scared to try

So why does it feel so wrong

To reach for something more

To wanna live a better life

What am I waiting for?

'Cause nothing stays the same

Maybe it's time to change

Maybe it's hopeless

(Maybe it's hopeless)

Maybe I should just give up

(Maybe I should just give up)

What if I can't trust myself?

What if I just need some help?

Maybe it's time to change

And leave it all behind

I've never been one to walk alone

I've always been scared to try

So why does it feel so wrong

To reach for something more

To wanna live a better life

What am I waiting for?

'Cause nothing stays the same

Maybe it's time to change

And maybe it's time to change

And leave it all behind

I've never been one to walk alone

I've always been scared to try

And maybe it's time to change

And leave it all behind

I've never been one to walk alone

I've always been scared to try

So why does it feel so wrong

To reach for something more

To wanna live a better life

What am I waiting for?

'Cause nothing stays the same

Maybe it's time to change

'Cause nothing stays the same

Maybe it's time to change

We all get into a rut sometimes... it's inevitable really.  One day blends into the next and then a week, a month, a year has passed... looking so similar to the last that it's barely distinguishable in your memories... That's life... the day to day grind of having a career, being a parent or someones spouse... owning a home, a car, having a mortgage.  But what happens if you wake up one day and your life has passed you by... take the time once in a while to make a change... whether it be something as big as moving to a new place or something as small as changing your hair color... let moments stand out apart from others... change is good... it makes life exciting.

Time is slipping

Yesterday was not a dream

Although I wish it were

Today should be so clear to me

But it just comes out a blur

Tomorrow will be another day

The time will just drag by

Tonight is just a memory

Of this mornings tears I cried

A faded dream is last week

When I held you tight

It feels like it was but

A daydream in the night

Yesterday the sun shone blue

Today it is now gray

We should have been forever

But now time has slipped away

This is another that I wrote a very long time ago.  Time has a way of speeding and slowing in our daily lives... dragging often when we least want it to and flying by when we are having the best times of our lives... funny how a decade can seem like a year... and life time can pass in the flash of an eye... Or seem never ending.  I find that our happiness determines how fast the passing of time goes...  Hardly seems fair the worst times are the slowest.

Just close my eyes

Just Close My Eye

(Author: Unknown)

Now the tears roll down my cheek

They just prove my mind set’s weak

Could I maybe join my friend

Choose the time my life will end

Leave this world that I despise

Feel my heart stop, close my eyes

Accepting all that we call death

Gasping for my final breath

Pray to God my final time

Commit my final moral crime

Rest in peace, I wish I could

End my life I think I should

Now I sleep pray I don’t wake

Beg the Lord my soul to take

Look up to the darkened skies

Just hold my breath, just close my eyes

Disregard that I exist

Now I leave the world like this

Glancing at the wicked knife

I can’t believe this was my life

Letting down all those who cared

Overlooked, those few seem rare

Life now ripping at the seams

Why now chase those nonsense dreams

Now I start my final trip

I now accept I lost my grip

Journey where my lifeline ends

Viewing where my life begins

Reflect on life, why question why

Accept I've failed, just close my eyes

Sad huh?  Misery sure does make some great poems.... I just want to say that suicide is never the answer... Every hardship, every heartbreak passes with time... makes you stronger and leaves you changed.  I have had my share of hard times and it seems like as one ends a new starts sometimes but every one changes me, and I wouldn't be the person I am without them.  Lately I've been feeling this great and wonderful feeling that my life is EXACTLY where it is supposed to be right now.... and that is a great feeling.  Who knows where I would be if I'd done anything different?

Life is a Highway

Life's like a road that you travel on

When there's ne day here and the next day gone

Somethimes you bend and sometimes you stand

Sometimes you turn your head to the wind

There's a world outside ev'ry darkened door

Where blues won't haunt you anymore

Where brave are free and lovers soar

Come ride with me to the distant shore

We won't hesitate

Break down the garden's gate

There's not much time left today

Life is a highway

I wanna ride it all night long

If you're going my way

I wanna drive it all night long

Through all these cities and all these towns

It's in my blood and it's all around

I love you now like I loved you then

This is the road and these are the hands

From Mozambique to those Memphis nights

The khyber Pass to Vancouver's lights

Knock me down get back up again

You're in my blood

I'm not a lonely man

There's no load I can't hold

Road so rough this I know

I'll be there when the light comes in

Just tell 'em we're survivors

Gimme gimme gimme gimme yeah

If you're going my way

I wanna drive it all night long

There was a distance between you and I

A misunderstanding once

But now we look in the eye

There ain't no load that I can't hold

Road so rough this I know

I'll be there when the light comes in

Just tell 'em we're survivors

Life is a highway

I wanna ride it all night long

If you're going my way

I wanna drive it all night long

Well had my driving test this morning.... I failed... God I hate those words lol.... the worst part?  I did everything absolutely perfect then got distracted at the very end and ran the last stop sign on the route....What a piss off lol.... Now I have to wait until February to retake... grrrr.... I'm very angry at myself today!

I Guess I Was Wrong

Shattered pieces of my life

Now fall to the ground

Thought that you would lift me up

Instead you brought me down

Thought that you would carry me

Instead you made me fall

Thought that you would give to me

Your everything, your all

My heart already broken

I thought that you would mend

Thought that I had found in you

A lover and a friend

Thought you’d give me hope

In a world so full of hate

Thought you were my destiny

But I guess this is my fate

I wanted a new life

Thought you were the start

Thought you’d never hurt me

But instead you broke my heart

I think we expect too much of people.  Put to much into expecting someone else to make us happy.  I think that if we as people could learn to rely on ourselves to find happiness we would find far less disappointment in our lives.  Of course this is easier said then done.  Love is one of those things that requires you to depend on someone else, that if we really want to do it right, requires placing our trust and happiness in the other persons hands... its too bad so many people take advantage of that and are careless with it. 

Untitled

Untitled

(Author: Niko)

I have seen it once but you took it away

I felt it once but you smashed it

You held mine in the palm of your hand

While you slowly and carefully ate it

I tasted yours once but it was burnt

I spit it back up and you smiled

It shouldn't be shared with the likes

Of such an unbearably innocent child

But it’s you who is burnt, it’s you who is hurt

It is you who is losing this fight

It’s you whom I hate for letting me love

When you new that it was not right

You’ll never know what I thought I felt

You’ll never smell it or taste it

You have lost more than you’ll even know

And you have nothing with which to replace it

I love this poem.  It's so bitter and angry... it puts me in the mood for fighting lol.  So eloquent in anger this author was... I've hung on to this poem for a long time...  It tugs on the darker side of me ;)